Fruitful

The monthly newsletter for aspiring downshifters,
and sustainable living enthusiasts.

June 2007
In this issue...

  1. Commit To Be Free.
  2. Creating Learning Communities. By Ron Miller.(Book Review)
  3. Your exploration this month.
  4. Quotes of the month
  5. Want to comment or contribute?
  6. Teleclasses and personal coaching

News and Events

Tuesday June 5th is United Nations World Environment Day. For more information, see the website.

In the Uk, 2nd -8th June is Recycle Now Week

“Committing to downshift – your questions answered.” Teleclass on Wednesday 21st June, 7pm Uk time.

Free Open forum. Bring your questions to the session and I will do my best to answer them there and then. This is an opportunity also to learn from others’ questions and the answers to them.

To reserve your space, email me, by Monday 19th June, with “June Teleclass” in the subject line and I’ll send you the bridgeline details.


1. Commit To Be Free.

What are you committed to? How does that make you feel - trapped or free?

If you yearn for a simple life when you’re actually living in the Rat Race, you’re living by someone else’s values and it’s your commitment to that that forms your prison.

Isn’t it amazing that just that little “c” word – commitment – can put the fear of God into some people and endows others with a warm, cosy feeling of comfort and security. How does that happen?

Perhaps it will help us if we first look at the opposite of commitment – ambivalence – the “wait and see” approach. Ambivalence can seem like an easy option in life on the surface of it. What if we’re unhappy in our job or in a relationship? The easiest solution might seem to be to just “wait and see” what happens and hope that someone else will do something that will make our decision easier – make us redundant, offer us another job, be unfaithful to us, fall in love with us. There is a case I think for taking this approach for short periods of time whilst we accept our situation and become aware of how we really feel about it.

Beyond that, whilst we are “waiting and seeing” we are likely to be directing our energies to feed our resentment, anger, frustrations and general discontent rather than using them for more productive pursuits. The biggest problem with ambivalence is that, in lifestyle terms, it represents stagnation. Our life then feels stuck, boring, lifeless and depressing because, like all living things, in order to be alive we need to grow.

No-lose decision making.

So, if being in ambivalence is not a good place to be, what’s the answer?

Making a decision.

Now “decision” is another word that some find challenging. When you assume that by making a decision you are depriving yourself of the other choices you have, then you will not feel free in your commitment. To feel free, you will need to know that you still have choices whatever you decide. Those choices might not be what you assume.

Suppose you are trying to decide whether to stay in your highly stressful but well paid job with good promotion prospects or to leave for a position that is less stressful and with shorter, healthier working hours, but with a lower salary. One popular method of helping yourself make that decision might be to write down the pros and cons of each choice and weigh them up against eachother.

Unfortunately, it can be very easy to remain in ambivalence even after doing this and your lists of pros and cons may well be a source of anguish and anxiety for what could be a very long time.

In her book “Feel the Fear and do it Anyway” Susan Jeffers suggests what I believe is a much more positive and effective method which she calls her “No-Lose Decision Making Model”. In this model, there are no “right” or “wrong” decisions, just different decisions. She suggests that we view each decision we make in our lives is an opportunity for personal growth and so it is not the decisions themselves that matter so much as our attitude to the outcome of our decisions. Having said that, of course it makes sense to research our choices and to listen to our intuition before making decisions. I’m not talking about being reckless in our decision making, but rather being confident enough to know that we are:

  • well-informed in what we do and
  • can handle whatever outcomes result.

How does that relate to the job situation I described earlier? If you find yourself in this situation, remember that what you are about to commit to is a process, not an end result. In other words, you can let go of the outcome. Your freedom stems from knowing that you are responsible only for the process, not from making something happen that may ultimately be out of your control. Also, you have the additional option of knowing that you can try out both choices. For example, you could:

1. Decide to stay in your current job and take measures to reduce the stressful aspects of your job.
2. Begin to cut your living costs so that you will feel less anxious about leaving for a less well-paid job if that becomes necessary.
3. If you are not happy with the outcome of that, then you still have the choice to leave and in the knowledge that staying in your current job would not have made you happy. You will also have learnt more about what’s really important to you in your employment and this will serve you when making further decisions.

Conclusion.

You can commit to be free when you:

  • Know what your choices are or are working to uncover them.
  • Know what you really want or how you want to be or are making moves to find this out.
  • Know who and what are important to you.
  • View decision making as an opportunity for growth.

Suggested Reading:

Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway – Susan Jeffers

The Simple Living Guide – Janet Luhrs


2. Creating Learning Communities. Edited By Ron Miller. (Book Review.)

“Young people in the present system are not perceived as growing, active human beings who seek meaning and connection to the world, but as units of production whose academic achievements contain primarily economic value.” So states Miller in the introduction to this informative and inspiring collection of accounts of community learning. One could be forgiven for assuming that the above quotation referred to those working in large corporations who feel very much that they are mere “human resource” and valued, on an individual and collective level as nothing more than that. However, it is the school establishment that Ron Miller refers to and his description leaves an impression of children on their own junior treadmill.

“Creating Learning Communities” offers some concrete examples and a wide range of experiences of alternatives to this “mechanized process of inducting young people into the culture of modernity”. Rather than yet another school reform, what Miller calls for is a rebuild of our education system. He would like to see education becoming person, ecological and life centred and truly democratic, fit for a sustainable society. He describes a learning community as a place where “…caring, responsible people nourish each other’s learning in the context of authentic relationships.” Home educators’ support groups and those involved with small, alternative schools may well find themselves fulfilling these criteria. Indeed, for those involved in such groups, I would strongly recommend dipping into the articles in this book for further inspiration and ideas.

Creating Learning Communities is published by the Foundation for Educational Renewal (www.pathsoflearning.net) ISBN: 1-885580-04-5


3. Your exploration this month.

Choose an area of your life where you are not sure whether to commit.

Write down your choices.

Which of these requires further information before you can make a decision?

What does your intuition tell you about your situation?


4. Quotes of the month.

"Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them."
Brendan Francis

"Your fears are not walls, but hurdles. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the conquering of it."
Dan Millman


5. Want to comment or contribute?

If you would like to comment on any aspect of this newsletter or submit an article for inclusion in it, please contact me by email.


6. Teleclasses and personal coaching.

How to Step off the Treadmill

A series of six teleclasses, each 45 minutes long, exploring the elements of downshifting, the reality of living a sustainable lifestyle in a consumer driven society and how to motivate ourselves to make the switch.

A teleclass is a straightforward, low cost and sustainable way of taking part in a group learning session. It’s like a conference telephone call.Each participant is supplied with a phone number to call at the appointed time. When you call, you will be welcomed to a virtual classroom where you can listen to the class leader present the teleclass material and you can participate by asking or answering questions if you wish. So it’s just like being in a real classroom or workshop setting except that you can take part in the comfort of your own home without having to travel anywhere!

To view the current teleclass schedule, click here.

Personal Coaching

One-to-one coaching can help you:

  • let go of your old,stressful way of life, find a new path of vitality and an improved way of living.
  • deal with fears surrounding financial responsibilities, your relationships with others and other consequences of making a major life change.
  • improve your health, wellbeing and spiritual life.
  • further your personal growth.
  • achieve balance, clarity and peace.

    You can view further details on personal coaching
    here.

7. Subscriptions and privacy policy

If this email has been forwarded to you and you would like to subscribe, please send a blank e-mail to subscribe@sallylever.co.uk.

I will never sell, share or otherwise divulge your contact details, including your email address, to any third party.

Subscriptions to this newsletter grow by your recommendation. If you have enjoyed reading it, please do forward it to your friends, relations and colleagues. Please feel free to use any material from this newsletter. All I ask is that you acknowledge me as the source and include my web address.


Have a fruitful month!

Sally

Sally Lever
Sustainable Living Coach

+44 (0)1749 674842
sally@sallylever.co.uk
http://www.sallylever.co.uk/